We Don’t Talk Anymore

Does your relationship lack communication? 

Communication is the basis of every successful marriage.

It creates trust and mutual respect between you and your husband. As a result, you will find it easier to find a compromise. It will allow you to be more intimate, and you will express your love more freely. However, it may not be very comfortable to do so. Communication requires one to be vulnerable and unafraid to speak what they are truly feeling.  

Many marriages fail due to a lack of communication. Therefore, it is crucial to learn this skill to grow a healthy and happy marriage with your partner.  


To be a better communicator, you need to break down some barriers. What is stopping you from clearly expressing your emotions to your husband?  It can be:  

  • Fear of conflict,   
  • Pride,   
  • Self-centeredness,   
  • Oversensitive,   
  • Low-self-esteem,   
  • Vulnerability,  
  • Fear of being corrected,   
  • Secrets or a   
  • Low emotional intelligence.  


Identify what is the cause of a lack of communication for you and resolve it. Perhaps you need to see a therapist or a coach to assist you in this process.  


How to communicate?  

Evaluate what you want to say before expressing yourself. Ask these questions:   

  • What am I feeling?  
  • What is the issue?  
  • What do I need from my spouse right now?  


Then evaluate if what you want to communicate is accurate, helpful, inspiring, necessary, and kind.   

Make sure you choose a good time for both of you to discuss the issue on hand. 

Do not take or make it personal, focus on the issue, not on the person. 


Pay attention to non-verbal communication, your body language and your tone of voice. For example, speak slowly and keep your volume down.  


Make sure you use kind words.  


How NOT to react during communication:  

  • Defend  
  • Assume  
  • Advise  
  • Correct  
  • Criticize  
  • Attack  
  • Interrupt  
  • Stonewall  


Face the issue with a positive attitude. Love and kindness are the most powerful tools in defeating anger and grief. Accept that you and your husband are different, and do not take him for granted.   


All relationships have their issues. It is inevitable and not something that you should stray away from. What matters is that when these conflicts appear, you are able to face them head-on with clear communication. Communication is the key to every healthy relationship.   


Every good marriage has good words, and every bad marriage has terrible words or no words at all. 

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